I think its fair to say in all relationships there comes a point that normality sets in. You know, everything just slows down and begins to take a more realistic turn. You run out of things to talk about other than your day from time to time. You no-longer have to check the mirror 20times before making a video call. You start to act very very naturally with one another. It is about this time that body noises make an appearance, and words don't always have the sweetness about then they used to.
It is often at points like these that couples think the high of what they shared may not just be all it was cracked up to be. This is where many begin to start questioning what they have. Are we even compatible? Did we just lie to each other for the past several months? etc etc.
This happens at some point to everyone, albeit not everyone has doubts or fears - but we are all faced with a change somewhere along the road. Reality often hits us hard and fast when the romantic notion of love makes way for the deep and meaningful knowing of a person. I believe there are many people who never evolve past this place and are continually seeking that fairy-tale excitement- that wears off when something becomes routine in our life. If we can get past this place and learn the value of love from a deep, unconditional acceptance, then we get to experience something much more magical.
James and i have been forced into situations that have allowed us to grow in what we share. Alas as with any growth it is often fraught with some measure of pain. But mostly this pain comes in the form of ego, resistance and negative self beliefs. The need to be right often comes at the price of happiness and peace. Learning to love and accept the things that makes someone unique, and focusing on what you love about that person rather than what causes you to be frustrated is a great way to encourage more of that in someone. When we give up the need to control others thinking and attempt to get constant validation for our own way of thinking, we are set free from being let down when someone we love doesn't agree. This in itself was a huge lesson for me. I finally figured out that i wasn't always going to be right. (even if i was to my own mind) Because its perception, beliefs and life's experiences that causes the concept of Right and wrong. So if you have different perceptions to me - you are going to see things from a different place! This is not a personal attack on my beliefs...simply a new perspective. One, which if i add it to my own will give me more vantage points to see the world from. This was a profound truth for me.
James and i always get through the tough times of being separated by distance when we remember what it is that we have given one another on the inside. What our relationship has created, and the wonderful things that made us fall in love in the first place. And finding the balance between it all, is what makes us KNOW that no-matter what life throws at us, we can choose to be happy, and nurture the love we share.
joanna xo
It is often at points like these that couples think the high of what they shared may not just be all it was cracked up to be. This is where many begin to start questioning what they have. Are we even compatible? Did we just lie to each other for the past several months? etc etc.
This happens at some point to everyone, albeit not everyone has doubts or fears - but we are all faced with a change somewhere along the road. Reality often hits us hard and fast when the romantic notion of love makes way for the deep and meaningful knowing of a person. I believe there are many people who never evolve past this place and are continually seeking that fairy-tale excitement- that wears off when something becomes routine in our life. If we can get past this place and learn the value of love from a deep, unconditional acceptance, then we get to experience something much more magical.
James and i have been forced into situations that have allowed us to grow in what we share. Alas as with any growth it is often fraught with some measure of pain. But mostly this pain comes in the form of ego, resistance and negative self beliefs. The need to be right often comes at the price of happiness and peace. Learning to love and accept the things that makes someone unique, and focusing on what you love about that person rather than what causes you to be frustrated is a great way to encourage more of that in someone. When we give up the need to control others thinking and attempt to get constant validation for our own way of thinking, we are set free from being let down when someone we love doesn't agree. This in itself was a huge lesson for me. I finally figured out that i wasn't always going to be right. (even if i was to my own mind) Because its perception, beliefs and life's experiences that causes the concept of Right and wrong. So if you have different perceptions to me - you are going to see things from a different place! This is not a personal attack on my beliefs...simply a new perspective. One, which if i add it to my own will give me more vantage points to see the world from. This was a profound truth for me.
James and i always get through the tough times of being separated by distance when we remember what it is that we have given one another on the inside. What our relationship has created, and the wonderful things that made us fall in love in the first place. And finding the balance between it all, is what makes us KNOW that no-matter what life throws at us, we can choose to be happy, and nurture the love we share.
joanna xo
